He that wasteth his father, and chaseth away his mother, is a son that causeth shame, and bringeth reproach.
The book of Proverbs addresses the practical dimensions of daily life, and this verse speaks directly to family and honor. In the ancient Near Eastern culture in which these sayings were written, caring for one's parents was a foundational moral obligation — not optional, but essential to what it meant to be a person of integrity. To rob a father was to strip him of his resources and dignity; to drive out a mother was to leave her homeless and unprotected in a world where women had little independent security. The proverb doesn't soften the verdict: this kind of behavior produces shame and disgrace — not only for the family, but most of all for the one who did it.
Lord, forgive me for the ways I have taken for granted the people who gave so much to raise me. Soften whatever pride or distance keeps me from honoring them well. Help me not to wait until it's too late to say or do what actually needs to be said and done. Amen.
There is a particular kind of grief that parents carry quietly — the kind born of a child who has become a stranger, or worse, someone who takes without giving back. This verse names the behavior plainly and doesn't flinch at the result: shame and disgrace. But before you file this away as someone else's problem, sit with it a moment. The proverb isn't only about dramatic theft or literal eviction. It's about what happens when a son or daughter stops seeing their parents as human beings worthy of honor and starts treating them as obstacles, inconveniences, or simply sources to draw from. Most of us won't rob our parents in any literal sense. But this verse pokes at something subtler and more common: the slow erosion of gratitude, the taking for granted, the long stretches of silence, the eye rolls, the ways we reduce our parents to their worst moments and forget the rest. Honor is not a feeling — it's an action, and it costs something. If your parents are still living, you likely have unfinished business: an unreturned call, an unspoken thank-you, an apology you've been mentally composing for years. This is your nudge.
What does this proverb reveal about how ancient cultures understood the parent-child relationship, and where do you see that expectation honored or abandoned in your own culture today?
Is there a way you have dishonored a parent — even subtly, even unintentionally — that you have never fully acknowledged or addressed?
This verse uses strong, unsparing language: shame and disgrace. Does that feel too harsh to you, or does it name something true about what this kind of behavior actually produces? Why?
How does the way you treat your parents — or the people who raised you — shape what the people watching you learn about how to treat others?
What is one concrete act of honor you could offer a parent or parental figure this week, even if the relationship is complicated or painful?
Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old.
Proverbs 23:22
The proverbs of Solomon. A wise son maketh a glad father: but a foolish son is the heaviness of his mother.
Proverbs 10:1
Thy father and thy mother shall be glad, and she that bare thee shall rejoice.
Proverbs 23:25
The eye that mocketh at his father, and despiseth to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out, and the young eagles shall eat it.
Proverbs 30:17
He that gathereth in summer is a wise son: but he that sleepeth in harvest is a son that causeth shame.
Proverbs 10:5
Whoso keepeth the law is a wise son: but he that is a companion of riotous men shameth his father.
Proverbs 28:7
There is a generation that curseth their father, and doth not bless their mother.
Proverbs 30:11
Happy is the man that feareth alway: but he that hardeneth his heart shall fall into mischief.
Proverbs 28:14
He who assaults his father and chases away his mother Is a son who brings shame and disgrace.
AMP
He who does violence to his father and chases away his mother is a son who brings shame and reproach.
ESV
He who assaults [his] father [and] drives [his] mother away Is a shameful and disgraceful son.
NASB
He who robs his father and drives out his mother is a son who brings shame and disgrace.
NIV
He who mistreats his father and chases away his mother Is a son who causes shame and brings reproach.
NKJV
Children who mistreat their father or chase away their mother are an embarrassment and a public disgrace.
NLT
Kids who lash out against their parents are an embarrassment and disgrace.
MSG